DEAR ABBY: I had a child with “Richard,” whom I met 10 years ago. I was married at the time but had been separated from my husband, “Eddy,” for nine months. Richard and I hit it off well; I was very attracted to him. Five months after we met, I accidentally became pregnant. When Richard found out, he bolted. We stayed in contact, and he met our son, “Brady,” twice.
Eddy and I reunited when Brady was 3, and since Richard was out of the picture, we requested to sever his rights so Eddy could adopt him. Richard didn’t show up, so legally we were able to proceed.
When we found out Richard had never told his family about Brady, I reached out to them. They want nothing to do with us! They don’t believe my son is a part of their family because rights were severed and they never knew about him, even though I have pictures of Brady and Richard together and Brady knows who he is.
Eddy and I have now been divorced for four years. I feel terrible for the way my son is being treated. Should I leave them all alone and close that chapter? — TANGLED WEB IN ARIZONA
DEAR TANGLED WEB: Continuing to pursue Richard’s family will get you nowhere. That chapter closed when Richard gave up his parental rights to Brady and Eddy adopted the little boy. Until your son is no longer a minor, Eddy may have a financial responsibility for him. I hope he is acting more responsibly than Brady’s biological father did and that their relationship will continue in spite of the divorce.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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